I was afraid that I would step on her. She was so small barely more than a handful. As I looked down at her, sitting on top of my foot, she looked back with a facial expression that would have melted Scrooges heart well before Christmas Eve. On one hand, I was getting annoyed. On the other hand, I just couldnt stay annoyed when looking into those adoring eyes and listening to that tiny little voice “skeeking” for my attention.
Her name was Wookie, and everywhere I went, there she was. Her favorite spot seemed to be right on top of my foot – all I needed to do was stand still, and she’d be sitting there. If I sat down, she’d be either in my lap, on my feet, or on the chair with me. She had just mastered the fine art of climbing up the stairs, so she was inescapable. She slept either on my pillow, or curled up on my chest. In a world where there are very few things that are totally dependable, there was one thing that was certain: Wherever I went, there was Wookie.
I stood at the kitchen counter, hazy and bleary-eyed, trying to focus my eyes well enough to pour that first cup of coffee. Wookie, as usual, was sitting on my foot. As I reached for the coffee pot, Wookie took a flying leap from my foot, grabbing the fabric of my thick, fuzzy robe with her claws, and then my little mountain climber proceeded to climb up Mount Daddy, paw over paw. Meanwhile, her startled daddy was trying desperately to avoid pouring hot coffee all over the kitchen counter and floor. Wookie scaled the heights of my robe, and finally came to rest on my upper left side, hanging by her claws as she nuzzled my neck and purred like a new chain saw. No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn’t be angry with her – I was enjoying her too much to be angry.
As I stood there, snuggling this little purrball, the still, small voice of God began to speak to my heart:
“Do you want to be close to me as much as Wookie wants to be close to you? As satisfying as this moment is, can you begin to understand how satisfying it is for me when you come to me just because you want to be close to me?”
Those words cut through me like a surgeon’s scalpel, with great skill and accuracy. I realized that I often approach God with an agenda – a wish list of wants, needs, and things I want to convince Him to do – rather than approaching Him just because I love Him, and want to be with Him. I thought of how hurtful it would be if Wookie only approached me when she wanted to be fed, then kept her distance until the next hunger pang. I remembered one of the most basic principles of our faith: God created man to have fellowship with Him. God longs for me – and you – to come to Him and just be with Him. If I would simply come to Him on that basis, the rest of the “important stuff” would be taken care of. Some of it, seen through they eyes of intimate fellowship with God, wouldn’t be so important. The real needs would be met without straining, and as our intimate God is able to direct us in the path where He wants us to go, everything we need to fulfill that calling would be amply supplied. The starting point isn’t our calculation and planning, but simply being close and intimate with God.
As I sat in the kitchen chair, holding Wookie and weeping, I realized that my ambitions had been robbing me of the great joy of just being with God. Just as Wookie was content and satisfied snuggled up close to her daddy, there is only one place where I can find that total peace and fulfillment – snuggled up in the arms of my Heavenly Daddy.